Click on the above link to read more and join the fun!
This last week the following absolutely did NOT happen to me, nope Not me!
· While sitting on the couch winding down one evening last week, I did not look over at Marley the cat because he was making a weird gagging sound. I then did not quickly realize he was going to up-chuck. I then did not throw a pillow at him to get him off the couch, and I did not hit him at the exact moment the up-chuck was up-chucking out of his mouth. This did not cause the nasty puke to fly, in slow motion I might add, all over the wall, the couch and lastly the floor. The cat was nowhere to be found, lucky for him. It was not at all an “ARE YOU KIDDING ME!” moment. I don’t have those types of moments; I’m perfect like Bree Van de Kamp from Wisteria Lane.
· There was not yet another “Diego Moment” this week. My sweet puppy pups was NOT attacked by a raccoon. My terrifying, aggressive pit bull did not look at Steve with a “HELP ME!” look and then look at the rabid raccoon with a “Can’t we just play?” look. He’s a pit bull they’re all mean, aggressive, child killers that lose all control and get lock jaw when given the opportunity to kill something dontcha know.
· Steve did not partly kill that raccoon…with a brick…make that two bricks.
· Dozer, a yellow lab that all suburbians love because he’s a non-aggressive, preppy yellow lab for goodness sake. White picket fence and 2 blonde kids (a girl and boy) playing in the front yard, no fighting of course, with their yellow lab. Isn’t that the picture of a perfect family? Yeah well that yellow lab, did NOT foam at the mouth for the opportunity to finish that critter off. When Steve gave good ol’ boy Dozer-Roze the go ahead, he ripped that coon to shreds. EW! I mean no he didn't.
· All the while my scary pit bull was NOT circling in fear with his tail tucked looking at Steve with wonder. I imagine he was saying, “I just wanted to play, don’t kill the little fella.”
· Lastly, my daughter Abbie-dabs did NOT burst out into laughter when Michael Jackson came on the television and say, “Mommy, look at that guy, he looks like a Dr. Seuss guy, he looks like a WHO!” I then did NOT realize that, oh my goodness he does look like a WHO.
Have a wonderful week, see you soon!
